The world perception of father, so on average each person generally agrees that to be a successful father and husband you need to make money. In other words, the are fixated on taking care of their families which is not bad. However, in their ambitions, if the family is not taken into account in how he spends his time with them marriages and families start to suffer. The man becomes blind to what matters most in his life and in the life of his family and though the goal is okay, he hurts more then expected. This is because a man's role in the home is not only to provide, but to preside. Presiding in simple definition means to lead, to be a leader in the home. He can't effectively do this when he is away nor can he if he doesn't take an active interest in the his families lives. When father spends more time at home, if he chooses to preside, everyone in the home feels more secure, safe, and a greater amount of peace. I know this is the case with my family, though I did not have a dysfunctional family and this may not be the case in all families, but if a father is doing their job as a spouse and a dad, the effect takes place within the home. When father is absent for extended periods of time homes miss out on level-headedness and leadership that the father can provide. Mom feels more like a single parent, having to deal with all the homely stresses alone. This often leads to feelings frustration and overall being overwhelmed being drained in all capacities as a mom. In order to prevent "work distancing", when the father spends to much time at work and not enough time at home, communication, making inspired decisions, making quality time, and realizing that success is not money can prevent this effect. This is because the man and woman counsel together, they can make an informed decision together, as they should in marriage, on the different factors of time at work and home. 

In society, the identity of the father is being lost amidst the goals of money and power in life. I do not recall an instance where anyone on their deathbed recalls and wishes that they had gained more money. It is more often then not, "I wish I had spent more time with my family". We can all be happy without excessive amounts of money in our lives. If we center ourselves around the family, around our loved ones we will not only be happy, but relationships strengthen and hardships are more readily able to be dealt with. Many marriages today fail because of financial reasons, whether it is time the man spends away or the fact that couples are divided on how to use it and are uncompromising, being present is the most important thing we can do as men to help our families. (I have written other blogs on communication and how spouses can learn to get along with one another) but families are being destroyed because of what has been mentioned above. When families are torn apart by divorce, not only do children suffer, but the original relationship between man and wife is shattered. Broken hearts left behind because of one issue or another and it sets both parties back emotionally, mentally, and physiologically. I plead that through better communication and a realignment of goals will help our families instead of break them apart. Set goals to change if there isn't satisfaction in your marriage or relationships. We can all choose to be different and be the difference in our families success.